Stop making other people's dreams a reality, and start making yours, isn't it about time too?
Good evening everyone, so this is going to be a slightly different post today and not nail related. I had been debating whether to write about this or not but feel I would like to get this of my chest and hopefully will help you all to get to know me a bit better. I do feel quite nervous putting this up but then again this is me and this how I am feeling right now.
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| Image taken from google, not my image! |
The last few months of 2017 wasn't the best, I was feeling pretty lost and not happy at all. I was bored of getting up and going to work, having to do what other people told me to do when I had ideas of my own and just never really truly feeling appreciated. Now I know that sadly that is life, working and maybe not wanting too but I also suffer with anxiety, and the majority of the times when I was at work I just felt trapped, it's kind of hard to explain but I was feeling irritated and fed up.
I have always loved what I have done, I am a fully trained beauty therapist and have always loved the more holistic side to it-so massages, facials, wraps, and of course nails. I have been doing the job for the past 7 years now I think and have been in various salons and spas, but for some reason even though I loved what I did I just never felt truly happy in a workplace-maybe due to my anxiety but I am not too sure. Maybe I just get bored too easy and fed up of the norm.
I have always pretty much felt anxious most of my life but never really knew at the time what it was, I care way too much, overthink and always give too much of myself to others whilst majority of the time getting it all thrown back in my face. Now my anxiety got much worse and has been pretty bad since losing my Gran all of a sudden a few years ago as it was a big shock to me and my family but is something I find too hard to talk about. Ever since it all I have not really felt myself, felt lost, irritated and angry at times.
I tried my best to get on and fight it all but then last year got to the point where I had just had enough, felt pretty tired, lost all interest of being at work and it didn't help as from doing massage for the past 7 years consistently, sadly my hands could not take anymore as I had repetitive strain injury and damaged the tendons in my hands which left me at the point of my hands being really painful to massage anymore. Sadly I had just lost my passion for massage and that's when I felt pretty much at a lost as what to do next.
Other things happened after this and it just came to the point where I knew that I needed some time out to really focus on myself and so I decided to quit my job so that for once I could put myself first and really focus on what I want to do next. This might sound crazy to some people but at the end of the day, your health is the most important thing and sometimes you need a bit of time to heal, like this quote says.. ' You can't pour from an empty cup. Take care of yourself first'. This is exactly what I intend on doing right now.
I have so many things I want to do, so many dreams that I am now going to focus on making a reality and not others. I have always wanted to be self-employed so this is what I will be focusing on this year, I have always said it but never done it but I feel now is the right time. I have worked hard but now is time to work even harder to make my dreams happen for once and why shouldn't I aye... 'Dreams only work, when you wake up and start making them a reality'. I feel excited for 2018 and I hope you all do too. I hope in some way this has helped some of you and if any of you need to ever talk I am always here. It's a battle every day with anxiety and feeling like this but I will not let it defeat me, I want to do more this year and do more exciting things, which I will. Life is here to enjoy and I intend on fully making the most of this year. Here's too 2018 being a great year for us all 💗
'Do more of what makes you happy'...
Take care, much love,
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